Craigslist favorits...

[SS]Wally · 07-23-2010

I thought we could share funny finding on Craigslist.

Here's my first:

Steel Shelving Units - STRONG LIKE BULL! (NE Minneapolis)
Date: 2010-07-23, 2:41PM CDT
Reply to: sale-j92tz-1859327160@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

I've got two (yes, TWO!) steel shelving units that I took out of my house. The last owner thought they were good cabinets in the kitchen. I disagreed and switched them out for real cabinets.

So, what I have sitting in my garage now are two steel shelving units, Twelve inches deep x 36 inches long x 16.5 inches tall. They can be attached to any kind of wall with cabinet screws and will hold whatever stuff you need to hold. FREE. In the pics, I only show one shelf. I have two. Come and get them.

Email me for the address. If this ad is still up that means that they are still available.

Thanks for looking.

* Location: NE Minneapolis
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

DatGuy · 07-23-2010

it'll be hard to top this one

[SS]Chief · 07-24-2010

That is a good one Dat....I'd rent that hizow!

[SS]Hobo · 07-24-2010

Check out this kid, WIN!
_____________________

GLENDORA, Calif.

A 17-year-old Glendora boy has turned an old cell phone into a Porsche through online trading.

Steven Ortiz made a series of 14 swaps over a period of two years, using the Craigslist website, to get his 2000 Porsche Boxster S, the Pasadena Star-News first reported.

It all started when a friend gave him an old cell phone and he had his eyes on a dirt bike.

Ortiz told KTLA, "I got to the dirt bike and I told myself, 'If I can get here, where else can I get?'"

He kept trading up, acquiring a MacBook Pro, a 1987 Toyota 4Runner, and eventually a 1975 Ford Bronco.

The Bronco, considered a collectible, scored him the Porsche.

Ortiz says he does his research first, searching the web for good deals. He also says you should never pay any extra cash for anything when bartering.

"I get so many people who say, `Can you trade my phone for a car?' I just say, `Yeah. It's not that easy,"' he told the Pasadena Star-News.

As far as successful bartering goes, Ortiz says anyone can do it.

"Anybody can do this as long as they put their mind to it. That's all it is -- your mind and your patience. You can't give up."

Ortiz's father says in this economy, many people don't have the money and are more willing to trade belongings for something they need but can't necessarily afford.

Ortiz hopes to go to college and study law or business.

He also says he is already looking for a new car since routine maintenance on a Porsche is pretty expensive.

"At 17, paying $1,200 for a tune up on a Porsche. I can do a lot with $1,200."

Ortiz hopes to trade the Porsche for an Escalade.

Link to Video

DatGuy · 07-24-2010

oh yeah Hobo, ever hear of the guy who started with a paperclip and ended up with a house...

http://www.oneredpaperclip.com/about/

[SS]Shooter · 07-24-2010

best of craigslist > los angeles > WARNING!!!
Originally Posted: Thu, 1 Jul 14:15 PDT
WARNING!!!

Date: 2004-07-01, 2:15PM PDT

Don't Shave That Hair!!!
I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble shitting.

No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold.

I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea.

I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over.

Little did I know.

I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry.

Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic shit- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky shit/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm.

Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering shit/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own shit blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks."

Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil.

As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony.

Friends, DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR!

PostingID: 35274458
Copyright © 2010 craigslist, inc. terms of use privacy policy feedback forum

[SS]Showstoper · 07-24-2010

I've read that one about the ass hair somewhere before Shoot...lol. Great breakdown on the importance of ass hair.

AEJustin1 · 07-24-2010

WOW, note to self, don't shave ass! LOL

[SS]Wally · 05-30-2011

NSFW

This is 5 mins from me! lol

Awesome Pink Pillow (Anoka)
Date: 2011-05-30, 11:31AM CDT
Reply to: sale-decnp-2410706953@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]
Totally awesome, totally unique pillow for free! Take it off my hands. Great for any college dorm or frat house. I don't care, just take it away.

Location: Anoka
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

[SS]Midnight · 05-30-2011

Oh my gosh. I can never unsee that. I hope the [r] saw it though....

Tagger · 06-16-2011

"Someone come adopt this scruffy one-eyed cat that has been hanging around my house! He's extremely affectionate and super fluffy, just scraggly due to his hardcore lifestyle. He has one eye so you can give him an awesome name like Cyclops."

FREE ONE-EYED CAT

AEJustin1 · 06-16-2011

cyclops.... Lmao

[SS]TuefelHunden · 06-27-2011

[SS]SportoFu · 06-27-2011

Hahaha

[SS]Wally · 06-27-2011

Sounds like Sports old voicemail

07-23-2010	#1
[SS]Wally ‘The Umbrella Man’ Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Minneapolis, MN USA Posts: 8,674	Craigslist favorites... I thought we could share funny finding on Craigslist. Here's my first: Steel Shelving Units - STRONG LIKE BULL! (NE Minneapolis) Date: 2010-07-23, 2:41PM CDT Reply to: sale-j92tz-1859327160@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?] I've got two (yes, TWO!) steel shelving units that I took out of my house. The last owner thought they were good cabinets in the kitchen. I disagreed and switched them out for real cabinets. So, what I have sitting in my garage now are two steel shelving units, Twelve inches deep x 36 inches long x 16.5 inches tall. They can be attached to any kind of wall with cabinet screws and will hold whatever stuff you need to hold. FREE. In the pics, I only show one shelf. I have two. Come and get them. Email me for the address. If this ad is still up that means that they are still available. Thanks for looking. * Location: NE Minneapolis * it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests "Guns don't kill people, lasers do." - Wally "I don't like repeat offenders, I like dead offenders". - Ted Nugent Born On Date: 1-30-2007 Last edited by [SS]Wally : 07-24-2010 at 02:13 PM.

07-23-2010	#2
DatGuy Registered User Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Toronto, ON Posts: 6,546	it'll be hard to top this one DatGuy "doubts my connections".

07-24-2010	#3
[SS]Chief Brew Master Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: The Desert Posts: 7,070	That is a good one Dat....I'd rent that hizow! "Give a man a beer, he'll waste an afternoon. But teach a man to brew, and he'll waste a lifetime!" Last edited by [SS]Chief : 07-24-2010 at 12:28 AM.

07-24-2010	#4
[SS]Hobo I'm your Huckleberry... Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Earth Posts: 1,753	Check out this kid, WIN! _____________________ GLENDORA, Calif. A 17-year-old Glendora boy has turned an old cell phone into a Porsche through online trading. Steven Ortiz made a series of 14 swaps over a period of two years, using the Craigslist website, to get his 2000 Porsche Boxster S, the Pasadena Star-News first reported. It all started when a friend gave him an old cell phone and he had his eyes on a dirt bike. Ortiz told KTLA, "I got to the dirt bike and I told myself, 'If I can get here, where else can I get?'" He kept trading up, acquiring a MacBook Pro, a 1987 Toyota 4Runner, and eventually a 1975 Ford Bronco. The Bronco, considered a collectible, scored him the Porsche. Ortiz says he does his research first, searching the web for good deals. He also says you should never pay any extra cash for anything when bartering. "I get so many people who say, `Can you trade my phone for a car?' I just say, `Yeah. It's not that easy,"' he told the Pasadena Star-News. As far as successful bartering goes, Ortiz says anyone can do it. "Anybody can do this as long as they put their mind to it. That's all it is -- your mind and your patience. You can't give up." Ortiz's father says in this economy, many people don't have the money and are more willing to trade belongings for something they need but can't necessarily afford. Ortiz hopes to go to college and study law or business. He also says he is already looking for a new car since routine maintenance on a Porsche is pretty expensive. "At 17, paying $1,200 for a tune up on a Porsche. I can do a lot with $1,200." Ortiz hopes to trade the Porsche for an Escalade. Link to Video Last edited by [SS]Hobo : 07-24-2010 at 01:38 AM.

07-24-2010	#5
DatGuy Registered User Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Toronto, ON Posts: 6,546	oh yeah Hobo, ever hear of the guy who started with a paperclip and ended up with a house... http://www.oneredpaperclip.com/about/ DatGuy "doubts my connections".

07-24-2010	#6
[SS]Shooter CO of Recruit Instruction Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Recruit Re-Education Center Posts: 5,047	best of craigslist > los angeles > WARNING!!! Originally Posted: Thu, 1 Jul 14:15 PDT WARNING!!! Date: 2004-07-01, 2:15PM PDT Don't Shave That Hair!!! I have recently made a mistake in my life, and I offer my story to you, that you may learn from my error. It all started, as many things do, with me having trouble shitting. No, I was not constipated; this was not a regularity problem but a matter of technique. It seems my ass-hair had grown to such a length that tiny grogans were constantly getting tied up in the matted jungle between my asscheeks. It led to much frustration, with me KNOWING that I still had something to drop, but unable to shake the tenacious turd loose from its butthair dwelling. Eventually I would have to do two things: either reach down with some paper and try to pinch off the lingering loaf (which required careful precision to avoid smearing the creature all over my rear, especially since I had no way of seeing what I was doing) or just go for broke, start wiping, and hope that I could remove all the leftover fecal matter before the toilet paper reached its Can't-Be-Flushed threshold. I was contemplating this problem, when I had what seemed at the time to be a bright idea. "Hey! This is my butt and my butt-hair, right? So why don't I just eliminate all the hair, and then my grogans will flow out like beer from a keg!" I said to myself. It is a statement that will go down in history with a lot of other regretted statements. "How many Indians could there be?" said by General Custer. "Looks like a good day for a drive!" by JFK. "There! America On-Line now has complete Usenet access!" by some idiot system tech. Such was my anal shaving idea. I performed the operation that night, with a cheap disposable razor and a towel to sit on. Starting from the bottom, and shaving from the crack to the cheeks, I began the arduous process of ridding my ass of hair. Occassionally, I would have to clean the razor of accumulated hair and miscellaneous slime, which I did by wiping it on the towel. Slowly, my twin mounds and the between-ravine began to resemble the hairless cheeks of a newborn baby. Finally, I wiped the razor one last time, and surveyed my work. The towel was covered with a pile of hair. My ass was smooth as ivory. I smiled, satisfied, thinking my troubles were over. Little did I know. I now have a great respect for anal-hair. Like everything in this world God created, it has its mighty purpose in existence. It was only after I had removed it that I started to learn how much I had been taking it for granted. For one, it provides friction. I learned this the next day, when I walked out into the sun heading for class. After climbing two flights of stairs and starting to sweat, I started to notice something unpleasant. The sweat was accumulating in my crack, and was causing the unpleasant sensation of my two asscheeks sliding past each other with every step. I thought about going to the bathroom and wiping it off, but had to get to class. Eventually, I thought, it would dry. Unfortunately, it did dry, but only after mingling with the microscopic shit- molecules lingering around my brown starfish. When I stood up after class, my cheeks were stuck together with a slimy sticky shit/sweat combination. As I made my way back to my dorm, it started to itch. God-DAMN, did it itch! Felt like a swarm of ants was making its way up and down my crack. Fighting to keep from jamming my hand down there and scratching away, I rushed back to the dorm. Unfortunately again, this exertion caused me to sweat, and when I finally reached my room, my cheeks were sliding back and forth against each other like a pair of horny cane-toads. I quickly dropped my pants, and attempted to dry my ass off by sticking it in front of a fan and spreading my cheeks. As I pulled the two mounds of flesh apart, a horrible stench burst free and filled the room. Every dog within a 4 block radius started to howl. I had it worst of all, as the ripe aroma of festering shit/sweat went into the fan and blew back into my face. I fought to keep from heaving. And as I sat there, fighting vomit, my ass cheeks spread and dripping, with the concentrated aroma of my body odor mixed with the tangy smell of my own shit blowing right into my face, I had only one thought: "It will be like this until the hair grows back. Weeks." Later on, trying to deal as best I could, wiping my ass at every opportunity, I discovered another wonderful use for ass-hair - ventilation. I attempted to launch a fart, only to have it get stuck between my asscheeks. Apparently, with no hair, the two pink twins can get vacuum sealed together, and the result was a frustrating fart that slid up and down between my cheeks like a lost gerbil. As if that wasn't enough, I am now enduring further torture. As anyone who has ever shaved anything knows, when hair is first growing in, it comes in as stubble. Imagine your ass having the texture of a brillo pad. Well, that is what I am dealing with now. It is a hellish torture, and there are many times when I just look out the window and contemplate why I shouldn't just jump out and get it all over with in one fleshy splat, rather than endure this constant agony. Friends, DON'T SHAVE YOUR ASS-HAIR! PostingID: 35274458 Copyright © 2010 craigslist, inc. terms of use privacy policy feedback forum *Keep your ears buttered up while I set fire to the rain!*

07-24-2010	#7
[SS]Showstoper XO of Recruit Instruction Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: High Desert Posts: 6,005	I've read that one about the ass hair somewhere before Shoot...lol. Great breakdown on the importance of ass hair. I WILL LEAD BY EXAMPLE, NEVER REQUIRING A RECRUIT TO ATTEMPT ANY TASK I WOULD NOT DO MYSELF.

07-24-2010	#8
AEJustin1 Registered User Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Lexington, Ky Posts: 1,232	WOW, note to self, don't shave ass! LOL If you don't stand behind our troops. Please feel free to stand in front of them... PROUD to be an AMERICAN!

05-30-2011	#10
[SS]Midnight Lima Oscar Lima! Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 8,276	Oh my gosh. I can never unsee that. I hope the [r] saw it though.... "Nobody makes me bleed my own blood! NOBODY!" -- White Goodman

06-16-2011	#12
AEJustin1 Registered User Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Lexington, Ky Posts: 1,232	cyclops.... Lmao If you don't stand behind our troops. Please feel free to stand in front of them... PROUD to be an AMERICAN!

06-27-2011	#13
[SS]TuefelHunden Semper Fratres, Semper Fi Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 1,252

06-27-2011	#14
[SS]SportoFu Canadian Chuck Norris Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: SK. Canada Posts: 4,731	Hahaha

06-27-2011	#15
[SS]Wally ‘The Umbrella Man’ Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Minneapolis, MN USA Posts: 8,674	Sounds like Sports old voicemail "Guns don't kill people, lasers do." - Wally "I don't like repeat offenders, I like dead offenders". - Ted Nugent Born On Date: 1-30-2007

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